Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Happy Tears!

There are happy tears absolutely pouring out of my eyes right now!
I just got to skype with my class and I can't even explain how happy it made me.
Yesterday was a really, really tough day.  I had a terrible headache and I laid on the couch ALL day long and just felt like a punk.
Today I feel "like a million bucks" (just for you dad) and to add the joy of seeing my kids on top of that made me so incredibly happy.
Not going back to work has been hard.   I love what I do and I feel like I do what God has called me to do which makes it harder to not go back. (I know the reasons why I can't and I understand that my health is more important but it still sucks)  I have some very needy kids this year and I was mourning the loss of the opportunity to love on them and show them God's love.  I know that they are in good hands and I am thankful for the wonderful staff that I work with.
Seeing them today and how happy they were to see me just made me smile so huge and it was exactly what I needed!

I am constantly being humbled through this experience with the reminders that I am not in control and the future is unknown.  I am also being humbled by the fact that I don't get to know the plan for any of this and that as hard as it is, I have to take it one day at a time.  What a way for a "planner" (which is what I called myself) to be humbled.  I have trusted God and his perfect plan for as long as I can remember but wow am I learning that I can't plan for everything nor should I try.  All I need to do is relax and let God take care of it one day at a time.

Sunday, October 16, 2011

So There's This Club

and I don't want to be a part of it.
and they like pink.
and I HATE pink
and I hear it really sucks.
I am a part of it.
I didn't get a choice
I am scared
I am nervous
I don't like it.
I know a BIG God!
I trust my BIG God!
I can run to my BIG God and be held!
My BIG God gave me an amazing family to walk with me through this journey and remind me of his BIG love every step of the way.

I was diagnosed with breast cancer while being pregnant on October 11.  You can follow my journey here.
God is BIG and he does BIG things. Join me as we journey through this and rely on God to meet all of our needs.

Thursday, October 6, 2011

A Few Random Things. . .

Grover got another gift. . . he/she loves it! I got a few extra kicks when I showed it to him/her. . . Yep that is right, I am feeling Grover move.  It feels a lot like tickling but it is pretty cool.

We also got a letter in the mail from cousin Mollie with a picture to show Grover every night and we have been diligent about that too.  He/she loves her too!

Some sweet friends of ours had a baby last week.  Wyatt was very excited to show his baby brother Easton off to Ryan!

 Wyatt decided he needed a turn holding Easton after everyone else had a turn.
 Ryan drove down after work so we could meet this precious new addition to the Ellenson family.

Congratulations Marty and Mandy (& Wyatt).  If Easton loves Ryan as much as Wyatt does we might have to move in with you :-)  We can't wait to watch your boys grow and see the wonderful things God has in store for them.