Today

It's here. The day I have waited for since October. Surgery day. I'm sitting here at 5:30am having gotten up specifically to drink some major huge glasses of water and eat breakfast before I am cut off from food and drink until I wake up from surgery. And we all know that I am going to feel like chowing down right then. Haha. I don't think I will be able to go back to sleep this morning either. Too many thoughts running through my head. not in a bad way, just too much going on up there. My heart is calm. A calm that all of you who know me understand is not typical of me in big situations. It is only possible with my God. He is amazing and I am so thankful that I can trust him to work everything out according to his plan. He has provided over and over and over again along this journey and I have no reason to doubt him. Things might not go according to my plan and what I have said I would like to happen but they will go according to his plan. He will not fail me and his plan is so much better than anything I could ask or imagine. Even when I don't understand it. Today is a big day. Life changing. Can I just tell you how blessed I am? My whole family is here loving on Ryan, Leo and I. Because of them, I can focus on healing and getting myself better and not worry about my little guy or my big guy. I know that they are both going to be taken care of by the best aunties, uncles, grammies, papas, and cousins. They are amazing and God knew what he was doing when he put our family together. Thank you from the bottom of my toes! It doesn't seem like enough to just say thanks. I could not do this without you. Ok. Time to sign off. Thanks for praying for us today. God is big enough. I CAN do all things through Christ who gives me strength. Philippians 4:13